Online Profile Pictures

I wrote a post a while back that discusses Fictitious Dating Profiles , geared at men who post fake profiles.  Now I find myself needing to speak out about men with no picture at all.  So here is the way I see this.  I have my picture up.  So in basic terms of tit for tat, if you try and contact a person with a picture, you better have a photo of yourself in return.  It is only fair.  While I have been sympathetic in the past to the multitude of excuses for not having a picture up, privacy, insecure, just don’t want to, blah blah, please understand that there will be no further communication from me.


Why do I draw such a hard line?  It is fairly simple, humans are visual.  I want to have an accurate picture of who I am talking to, prior to making any sort of connection.  There is a safety aspect, too, that I will fall back on when I am trying to be nice.  The whole, having a conversation with someone and then finding out what they look like weeks later, and it’s your next door neighbor old stalker, or some scary stuff like that.

The bottom line though, I do not like surprises.  I do not find it fun, to make an online connection and then find out that the person is morbidly obese, or completely not my type.  I have a wonderful partner.  I am not looking to find blind love on the internet.  I would rather that no time was wasted on a killer personality (see what I did there?), but someone who hadn’t cut his hair in year or left his basement except to go the occasional drive through window, which appears to be is his only source of nutrition other than the simpler delivery option.


I just cannot take a person seriously that is so afraid of posting a picture online of themselves looking to meet other people.  Are you honestly that scared of the co –worker finding your online profile?  Why?  What is that co-worker doing on there?  Perhaps the same thing you are?  Or are you not allowed a personal life outside of the office?  Ok fine.  You are insecure and truly want your wit and charm to shine through over your looks.  You have decided that you do not think looks matter.  Then why are you clicking on the profile pictures of someone else, and not reading their profile?  Are we a wee bit hypocritical there?  Hey, you’re hot, but I’m not, so don’t be superficial and just pity fuck me OK?




My rational for posting a picture on the online dating sites could go on and on.  But the bottom line is, I want to see the person I chat with.  When we go out on couple’s dates, we check out the pictures of both parties, or we do not go.  Very, very simple.  If reading this makes you feel a little butt-hurt, or your brain is racing with that one excuse that would change my mind, feel free to share.  But also, please include a picture of yourself.


If you want to learn more, please follow Breaking Away from Relationship Norms.


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