Our First Hotel Takeover – A Tale in Two Parts – Part II (NSFW)

So, with the logistics and lessons learned all blogged in part I, lets move onto the sexy adventures part that I know you are all waiting to read, because really, isn’t that the whole point of attending a lifestyle party?

We arrived at the New Years Eve Ballroom dressed to impress, or as the theme goes, Fancy as Fuck!  I was wearing a sexy red dress with nothing underneath, and my partner was looking dapper in his three piece suit. We had a little liquid courage back in our hotel room while waiting for midnight to arrive, so were feeling pretty confident as we walked into the grand ballroom moments after the ball dropped.  Here we stood, looking around at the hundreds of people drinking, mingling and grinding on the dancefloor. The visual sensation was amazing, with girls in little panties and pasties dancing in cages, couples getting to know each other on white leather couches, and a full dancefloor lead by a live DJ and a laser light show. There were smiling faces everywhere, and it was contagious.

Now if you will recall in part I, I remarked how important the meet and greets and early events are to being successful at a hotel takeover. Having been unaware of this, our evening got off to a slow start. I, for all my credit, have not practiced the art of opening up a couple in a long time.  Back home we let our costumes do most of the work, and here we found ourselves in a situation where we didn’t immediately stand out as being the most outlandishly dressed. In addition, this was a room full of people who had already vetted each other out and in many cases had playtime all weekend long.  A few it seemed were all partied out from the night before and simply stayed till midnight before dragging their hungover butts back to their rooms.

Never one to be discouraged in new situations, my partner rallied and challenged me to a little game. My goal was to go up to a stranger and open them up. It didn’t matter if I wanted to fuck them, they just had to want to fuck me by the end of the conversation. I love games, and with a few deep breaths, I found a woman, beautifully dressed, standing alone, and I went to make my move (which is especially challenging for me because I am for the most part straight). Success!  I opened, got her laughing and was actually able to introduce my partner to her, and she in turn tried to introduce her husband to us.  As it turns out he was distracted, so we took our leave to continue the hunt.

Walking around the dancefloor, my partner, encouraged me to go up to a guy in a pineapple suit, dancing happily on the dancefloor and compliment him.  This I serendipitously did, and both he and his girlfriend would end up opening doors for us, and inviting us to parties for the remainder of the night. After dancing, and chatting up a few more couples in the ballroom and the afterparty, we decided it was time to pursue some sexy fun. The pineapple suite couple invited us to their afterparty, and it was here we learned a magical thing of hotel afterparties, the open door policy.  If the door lock is flipped open, you are free to just walk into any room and find the sexy show of your choosing. It’s an incredible thing.  7 or 8 floors in a hotel, and at least 2 open doors on each floor (we were told that the night before there were a tonne more). Even so, here we stood, in a room with a bunch of strangers talking about vibrators, butt plugs and spankings. Moments like this will always seem surreal to me. Finding a bunch of sex positive people, all in a room, talking about sex like it is completely natural, and commonplace. I get a little quiet in these moments, just taking it all in. I watch, just listening as people laugh, tie each other up, pull out toys and bring out copious amounts of lube. It is an experience like none other. After watching for a few more minutes it was time for my partner and I to find some sexy adventures of our own.

I will gloss over the next few hours of hotel exploration, and hallway blowjobs, because I want to get to our steamy and sexy story which if is too much for you, then please stop reading here. Also, this is a great time to point out, that swinging is not easy! It actually took us hours to find what we were looking for, with constant negotiations, checking in, and of course sips out of our flask! But again, let’s fast forward to about 4 in the morning where our hard work was about to pay off.

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We found a hotel room, that we had been in and out of already a few times. It had a stripper pole, a table full of booze, bed, couch and a few chairs. I was publicly giving my partner a BJ on the couch, with a few onlookers (which is one of my favorite things to do at a party), and he was edging closer and closer to cumming. Just before he reached the moment where he would lose control, he begged to fuck me on the bed. Suddenly I was bent over the side of the bed, with my dress lifted, and him lubing up his hard cock. Within seconds he was inside me, pounding me, leaning me propped up on the side of the bed.  A woman dressed in a school girl costume sat on the bed beside me, and a guy who was pursing her looked longingly at playing with us both. He asked politely if he could touch me. With a slight pause I said yes, and he gently touched my arm. When he got the go ahead from the school girl he started fondling both of us. Within moments my partner was asking to touch her, too, while pounding me, and the playful four-way groping had commenced.

It’s hard to describe the feeling of two new mouths, licking and sucking your nipples, while fondling each other, and your partner fucking you from behind making you cum again and again, and watching his outstretched arm fondling her small and very perky breasts.  These are moments you want to freeze frame and relive again and again, which is the main reason I am writing this.  Pure sexual bliss and freedom.  That moment of shared pleasure, and pure ecstasy. With everything building, it was time for my partner to join in the cumming fun.  He flipped me onto my back, and within a few thrusts was ready to let loose all over my exposed breasts and stomach.  At the moment of climax, the guy behind me grabbed my breasts and played with them as cum shot all over my bare body.  With exclamations of oh, that is so hot from the couple sharing our experience, we breathlessly finished.  Happy and exhausted. It made everything we had experienced that night worth the lessons and learning curve.  We came, and we were beaming with the after-sex glow we love so much.

Our first hotel takeover was a success.

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#ReindeerBoob and the Fine Line About Censorship

Last week, a friend of mine sent me a few images of #reindeerboob and I was immediately smitten with them.  Combining my love of costumes and showing off I knew this was a photo shoot I needed to do.  So, I sipped some wine and started drawing out what would become a set of antlers, picked out a shirt and enlisted my partner to take some pictures of the completed look.  After taking the pictures, I grew a little sad that this photo album would be for my Patreon fans only.  What a waste I thought!  And then, yesterday, on Facebook of all places I saw it, a post of #Reindeerboob in all its public glory.

But wait a minute, Facebook is supposed to be a family friendly platform, so how was this post not flagged as inappropriate?  Why is what is basically a bare breast with a little bit of glitter and decoration suddenly OK to show?  Well, while it may be flagged as offensive by some, it actually doesn’t violate the prime policy Facebook leans on, and that is the display of the female nipple.  The other component, is that in this case, the breast is not sexualized (well I mean arguably it’s more humorous than randy), but the fact remains, the breast is not being displayed in a way the elicits any sexual behaviour.  It is simply a fun place to put a reindeer, and all the naughty bits are covered up.

Does this seem a little weird or fishy to anyone else?  Why is this the line?  What makes the nipple something worthy of censorship?  Why are we all so afraid of seeing this particular body part?

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Honestly, I have no answer.  There is little rhyme or reason other than someone was asked to draw a line in the sand about what to censor and the nipple was poking just a little too far out.  It was bright and perky, and got noticed.  And well, I now keep my nipples out of the sunlight.  I keep them hidden from public platforms like facebook, and show them off less proudly on my blog.  That’s a hassle I just don’t need in my life.  I have zero desire to have someone tell me that my nipples violate anything and need to be put away, or hidden from view.  No one tells me what I can and cannot do with my body!  So, I toe the line.  I adhere to the policies of the public platforms I use, as best I can, and instead of challenging a faceless entity with my pictures, I use my words.  I use this blog, and the vlog to shout as loud as I can, that censorship is bad, and #FreetheNipple! And when I see the opportunity to follow the rules and show off?  Well, obviously I pounce!  So enjoy this wonderfully festive hashtag.  Make your own #reindeerboob.  Share it with pride!  Have fun with it!  And most of all make this your most sex positive holiday yet!

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Imagine a World Where Monogamy Didn’t Exist

 

What if you had never heard the term monogamy?  Instead, you were raised to believe that loving whom you wanted was possible and even encouraged.  That when you fell in lust, you were not shamed, but instead praised and even encouraged to share your good fortune or some sexy stories to an accepting audience.  What if your partnership was enhanced, by for example, morning videos of sexy times that new acquaintances or loved ones shared, and that became a part of your sexual experience?  What if instead of sex shaming, we were a sex positive community that promoted safe sex, and human growth in whatever sexuality made the most sense or was even intriguing in the moment?  What if our sexuality was a guilt free experience?

I was raised in monogamy.  I was raised to feel guilty for not settling down and raising a family at the first chance I got.  I was shamed for ending an engagement and not trying harder to stay with my first love and overcome any and all obstacles together.  I was told that forever was finding a partner and uniting to become you and him against the world.  That was true piece of mind, and the ultimate goal.  Forever, with your soul mate, never having a wandering eye or straying from the one partner you would share your bed with exclusively, forever.  I was raised with the absence of non-monogamy.  I knew nothing about the spectrum outside of a monogamous reality.  And if anything outside creeped into my reality, it was judged, squashed and shamed, so vigorously that I barely had time to give it a second thought.

But after waking up this morning to sexy video of a new couple we are exited to hang out with, I was exuberant in the fact that I could enjoy sex with my partner, and my ongoing fantasies completely shame free.  I felt normal, and healthy and sex positive!  Even now, I feel zero guilt for my imagination running wild with possibilities and what ifs.  And the bonus of being able to share the sexual highs with my partner, or to be on the receiving end of his sexual excitement, sigh, it is exhilarating and liberating.  And I almost wish this had always been my adult reality.

I don’t necessarily regret monogamy, as that is how I was raised, and I accept that.  But I do wonder how much further ahead in life I would be if I had overcome jealousy earlier in life.  How that would have impacted my work and family life.  And more to the fact, how much closer I would have gotten to people sooner.  I lived a very closed life, safely guarded for decades.  And now that I have opened the doors wide to opportunity, closeness and love, I feel this incredible joy.  Hugging people I care about is no longer awkward.  Saying I love you, to a platonic female friend is hard to even put into words.  I am actually stumbling to describe the feeling, other than to say, I sit here with a full heart, and a huge smile on my face just thinking about how great we both felt texting a quick “I love you” after an update on our lives.  I wish, in a very profound way, that I was raised to believe that expressing yourself in a full and complete way, had always been acceptable.

As I write this, I cannot help feeling that speaking my truth will be construed as bragging.  And while blogging in the way I do, has definitely helped to silence the fear I get from naysayers or criticisms, if nothing else by thickening my skin considerably, I still feel this is important to share regardless of the negative opinions of others.  I have found considerable joy in non-monogamy.  And I find it exciting to imagine a world not confined by the social constructs of one man for one women, till death do they part.  We have already seen a huge social uprising, fighting for equality of the sexes and huge exposure of sexuality and gender issues.  It is a remarkable time to be alive.  So much social change is occurring, I am honestly excited for the next generation to be raised free of gender norms, in the same way I feel I was raised free of racial issues.  It’s a step forward, and one that I feel will ultimately bring us closer together.  While multiple love may not work for everyone, at least being tolerant of it, and accepting it in friends and family, in my opinion would be a pretty cool society to live in.  A place that maybe one day, had never even heard of the word monogamy.  Love who you want, when you want, and for however long that you want, so long as it is mutual and brings joy to your life.  In short, the possibility of living in a world where monogamy didn’t exist.

 

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Non-Monogamy and Popping Cherries

In my monogamous upbringing, I was taught, like many of us were, that losing ones virginity was basically the pinnacle of sexual exploration and maturity.  There was zero conversation in regards to what milestones existed beyond the “popping of one’s cherry”.  It was simply a goal of everyone to lose virginity either in the confines of marriage, or as a pubescent race to experience this physical milestone as fast as possible.  Arguably these are the two main schools of thought, and obviously in our sex positive narrative, wrought with misconceptions and at times even a dangerous quest, as I’m sure you are well aware.  If you, did not experience this as part of your sexual education then I am indeed envious.

But lamenting the past is something I want to do as little as possible in this post.  Instead, I want to celebrate something truly amazing.  The opening of my non-monogamous eyes to the new and exciting world of cherry popping in all it’s vast and wondrous forms, that are far reaching and almost limitless if you use a little bit more of your sexual arsenal, creativity, and perhaps an extra hand or two.

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Last weekend, a couple remarked that we popped their cherry in regards to a very sexy, same room sexual encounter.  It was more of an exhibitionist focused tryst, but a real cherry was popped none the less.  This was a first for the couple and they left recharged with sexual energy that was amazingly contagious.  And that my friends got my mind racing.  During my non-monogamous journey I have experienced what feels like a lifetime of new, and amazing sexual firsts.  I have had my cherry popped in so many different ways, that I blush just to think how long that list is getting.  It is an incredible world of firsts, and newness, and well, the heart races just a little bit when I recall my first threesome or my first time reaching an orgasm with strangers watching, or… I better stop while I am ahead here and still able to type.

But the thing of it is, in monogamy, I would not have come even close to being able to list the things I have.  And this is not because I would not have been able to experience many of these things via role playing, dirty talk, fantasy, etc, but because the conversation was halted at the loss of losing your virginity.  In my monogamous life, that was pretty much it.  You had one milestone that you could talk about with your friends, and then, you either had sex regularly or you were on the quest to find someone who would.  I’m not saying it’s a bad thing, just a completely different way of looking at the world.  I now see possibilities and new experiences that I  yearn to try, and I can share them, talk about them, and even plan new adventures in this freeing lifestyle.  Whereas in monogamy, I just cannot envision me saying to a friend even half of the things that I am able to express  in this blog for example.

Viewing new experiences in the light of “cherry popping” goes beyond just a sexual bucket list.  It is, for me, the embracing of new experiences as an exciting bonus of the lifestyle.  The addage that you don’t know if you like something unless you try it, sort of mentality.  It’s a freeing concept that is fueled by the many positive experiences that I am having, and works to push out the limiting and often impulsive word “no” from my vocabulary, which has more far reaching benefits in my day to day life as well.  While I am still not quite at the enthusiastic “hell yes” phase, when it comes to new people and adventures, I am definitely heading in the right direction.  So thank you to all who have helped me pop a cherry or two, and a very special thank you to those that allowed us to be a part of your firsts!  Cheers to many, many more sex positive adventures!

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What to Tolerate as a Sex Positive Blogger?

As I went through my comment feed today (on the blog and twitter) I was struck by a strange feeling that I have become desensitized to a lot of the crappy comments I have to deal with, and I really don’t know how to feel about that. I am on a personal mission to share my experiences in non-monogamy and the communication growth that I have gained during this time. I share things about my life, my experiences, perspectives, and even the sex positive body image that I feel more often than not. I put myself out there, not to brag or gain notoriety, but instead to work through my thoughts and feelings while at the same time earnestly trying to help others going through something similar. But the thing of it is, whenever you post something online you are opening yourself up to the good, bad and the ugly.

And today, I was struck by just how unimportant the trolling has become to me. Even 6 months ago, I recall talking to @huntergash on gtfo about how much the trolls were basically ruining the online experience. I remember feeling enraged, and passionate about the subject. And now? I feel almost numb. As if, I no longer care about trying to educate or enlighten these trolling and aggressive anonymous beings. And it feels incredibly weird.

With everything going on politically right now, I guess it’s almost fitting that I feel less like my voice matters or will be heard with the correct people. As much as I try and funnel those who just want to look and not glean anything from my writing to the appropriate channels (Patreon), I still get a barrage of inappropriate comments on a seemingly daily basis. And I find myself lazily muting, or blocking them, rather that responding. Is that in part because I am much busier with life than I was 6 months ago? Or perhaps are they “winning” so speak, in that I am accepting their presence as part of publicly posting? Or is there something else that I haven’t quite thought of or just won’t admit to myself quite yet. Maybe, just maybe, it is too daunting a task to educate strangers.

Case and point. Have you ever known someone who has been overly aggressive or sexual in person, only to find that on social media they brag about how they have never been that guy and are disgusted by the men who belittle women? And did you feel helpless to call them out? Or a gut wrenching conflict to out their behaviour thereby stooping to a level they may understand? Or did you just ignore and reconsider if your memory of past behaviour was even accurate? I ask these questions publicly because I am struggling to define my role right now. I feel like my voice is falling on deaf ears. There is no educating new readers, rather, people skim and agree with the parts they like and ignore the parts they don’t. No one wants to question themselves or ask the tough questions. Have I in the past behaved inappropriately and am I willing to admit that and grow, change or even just asking questions?

I love blogging, and being public. But the reality is that it feels less important than it did in the past. It feels like the conversation is over, and people read what they like and dismiss the rest. There is no challenge of opinions or desire to better ourselves. Should I go back to scolding strangers who violate my trust and sex positive outlook? Or do I continue my latest trend of just ignoring? Honestly, it feels so challenging right now to continue the dialogue of a sex positive nature and balance the outright stupid comments with those of my incredible resources, fellow sex positive bloggers and fans.